just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
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