Please, let me fuck your mom
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
