I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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