You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize