i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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