we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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