I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
