Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
