I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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