Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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