looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
