saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
