She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
