i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
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I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
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Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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