I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize