so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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