Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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