I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
