Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize