I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
