can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
