I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
