There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
