Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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