I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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