Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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