they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
