when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Randomize
