i permit you to call me
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
