Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
