i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
