plz talk dirty to me
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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