Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
