you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
