Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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