There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
My vagina just recognized that song.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
