M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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