remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
