We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
