i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
