carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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