she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
