If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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