I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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