Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
