Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
it's great music for shaving your balls
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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