2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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