Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize