All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
