white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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