It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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